onsdag den 29. december 2010
Unconventional parking or lack of excitement?
Ok. It's winter her in Denmark. And we do have a lot of snow... But what's really going on?
Our drive way has been filled with ice and snow for over a month. So I always use the back gear to drive in, so I won't stuck fast in the snow piles when I drive off to work the next day. Today I was coming home from a quick tur to the neighbour town, when I suddenly realized I had reared into the wrong drive way. It was actually not a drive way, but the tiny snowy lane to my neighbours by the lake. To make things worse, there was a sign right behind my car. Oh-oh, I thought, not another one! Last fall I managed to run a traffic sign down midt in a sleepy drive throu town nearby...
I tried to turn away from the sign, but the wheels wouldn't find any stand in the snow. The car slid down. I managed to turn it, so I didn't bump into the sign. Full stop. Check all mirrows... Sigh! Nothing happened. Not yet anyway. But the sign was only a few millimeter from the car! I felt helpless! If I tried anything at all, I'd certainly dammage the car... I called for help. A couple of hours later my car was safe and unscrached back on the road thanks to the car helpline!
As I sit her and think about it, I wonder what really is behind my moment of distraction, which lead to the "unconventional parking" a few meters from home. Why did I make that mistake? Why am I so light headed? Is it just one of those moments of human nature's failure, or is it something else?
The phone rang, and I talked to my dear friend, Mette. She had an interesting theory: maybe I'm lacking excitement. Life is good right now in many ways. And I was used to beeing challenged all the time. So when things are calm, I might unconsciously attract situations or even create them, where something unexpectet happens and messes up with my plans...
That was a very much to the point observation! :-) But is it true? A little soulsearching brings me back to a nagging feeling that's been with me since last summer. I've been so busy that I haven't had time to work with my art. And that's been creating this huge frustration inside me. So, that might be my 'lack of excitement'.
For it is exciting to start a new art piece, to play with my textiles and coulors not knowing what they will turn into... It's in a way risky - I have to move pass my confort zone, I have to dare my "sensible" self and give in to my "sensitive" side.
So my new year's wish is to get excitement back in my life, through my art, through expressing myself. And hopefully that will keep me grounded, so I won't turn into wrong lanes or make ill choices...
Happy New Year, everyone! :-)